Many of you already know that I’m a lover of blue cheese. In fact, my lust for fungus-ridden old milk goes so far as to prefer consuming it directly from the brick. It’s really quite disgusting.

Today at work, the cafeteria ran out of blue cheese dressing. Normally, this wouldn’t be a problem; I’d just go with something else. However, the nice folks at the cafeteria pulled a bit of a bait-and-switch.

The cafeteria workers solved their blue cheese dressing deficiency by putting out a cheap facsimile. You see, the food industry decided at some point that blue cheese mixed into ranch dressing is a reasonable replacement for real blue cheese dressing.

Wake up food industry! The reality is that there is no substitute for real blue cheese dressing.

Any real blue cheese lover would tell you that.